paying for liquor with change.

I dreamt last night of climbing fences in the dark and being chased by mastiffs. There were dozens of them. My housemates and Bobby, Eagles and I were all running from them. Jen's friend fell and the dogs had her in their mouths and I had to pry her from them. They weren't touching me or trying to hurt me. She had fallen asleep and didn't understand. Eventually, she chastized me but i took her with us anyway.

Some things you might need to know:

D. Boon, J. Belushi, J. Dean. Maybe dying early? Dig my matrix and stop swagger jacking. I want a dog and a front porch, and may be getting evicted. Holler if you have a house.

jamz

how to stunt.

Tonight is Jeremy's birthday. He's thirty-two now and is aging like Sean fucking Connery. We are celebrating and listening to some ol ninety eight jams. The clouds are gathering, and the heat is breaking. The second wind of summer is about to crack open, and the horoscopes say that this whole mercury in transition thing is about to be over for now. But forget a mercury, you can't stunt in those. You can stunt on a puch 10 speed though. My rims is seven-hundred cm. Rust colored. The competition getting dust-covered. Off-whites and V-necks are the uniform. Vans are the kicks until the wallys come back (or until the bread does). Sweat is in. So is two-wheel transport. For the fall? Remixes. Remixes. Remixes. Please prepare.

Jams.

gratitude

total. epic. dance. JAM.
Thank you desert eagles.
More when I recover.

I am back alive.

jams.

the other oceanfront won't wait long

A friend told me that you don't have to come to a conclusion every time that you sit down to write. I replied that, unfortunately, conclusions are awfully abundant.

I need an open space to have a good idea in, everything lately feels like slick talk to charm a comely cousin. Not my scene. In less than a month i'll be back where the air conditioning (and mosquitoes) will be ubiquitous and free. June will fry trout. I will make sides (and most likely post the recipes). I'll probably have to drink all the Bourbon by myself, depending on Mr. Garcia's mood. Lord willing and the creek don't rise, there'll be just enough ice to put me to bed. It'll be good to see Tina and Lucy, and I'm also all thanks since Miss Kay has a clean bill of health. If you're bored saturday, you can find me in the club. If you're bored sunday, go fishing.

as a mug...

james.

heat wave

"Dear lord, please save us from the third world war/ I want to do a world tour/ before world war four."

Something about the weather and the power outage make it even harder for me to comprehend the missles in Beirut. I can't wait until my friend makes it to Europe so that I can stop worrying. I am on cloud "stoked" otherwise. Me and Bobby Evans are playing with the Circle Jerks and the Wu-Tang Clan in the same weekend, and I am doing a chorus on a jam with Sadat X. I am pretending to take all this in stride, but fanning the fuck out on the inside. Big ups to Despot and Get the Fuck Up.

is there anymore room for me

in those jeans?

an old prayer

"Music, rescue us from our youth. It is big enough to destroy us all." us ca. 1999.

My friends and I have saved the world at least seven consecutive summers (some of us more), and I am only now beginning to feel the dull and fading effects of time. RJ is putting together a book of the last few years at the house, and I was thinking about how difficult it is to transmit nostalgia to someone who wasn't there. When you see young skin in old photographs of people you know it gives you an awareness of the only fact: decay is constant. We scream from pictures: "I am a glass of water. I used to sparkle."

The insight seems to come a bit early. I've never imagined living all that long, but I think that assumption was linked to my idealization of brighter stars with shorter half-lives. Time is, after all, very good to some people. Maybe I can have a dry-docked sailboat I work on for nine months out of the year, and sons who bang it up against everything in the sound for three. Then repeat until they feel their own peaks passing. For now, i feel as far from this as I am from the birth canal, and I have no plans of purchasing any sefaring equipment that doesn't say sperry on it for years. I have been a little ocean obsessed lately, maybe some salt air and wind can cure it. Anyone for a trip down south?

all aboard...

james.

plum hateful

Ambivalence is a hell of an MO. It appears that there is a rebuilding season ahead, and on top of that, my comments are getting spammed. I could be bummed about it, and spin my wheels and bicker, and maybe i'd even bring you into my lil sphere of grumpiness, but instead, i'm going to go get excited about how radical Aaron Farley's photo blog is, and I am going to urge you to leave here now and do the same. It never hurts to watch a lot of happy people have a good time.



I'm going to go 'shake it off' (emancipation of jimmy?), and try and come up with something worth writing about.

till then,
elephant prince.

chill retardo

"Fame is a form of incomprehension, perhaps the worst." J. Borges.

Massive rap day number two in a row. I just watched Ghostface and Rick Ross play to thirty people at the Malibu Inn, and I was videotaped for BET in a segment that disses the dipset. It's a long story, and I am remaining neutral in any and all beefs, in keeping with my usual policy. I kept imagining what it must be like to play for thirty people as a seminal and platinum selling artist who actually still makes good and relevant records over ten years after debuting. I don't have to imagine what it's like to play for thirty people when you're not. Then there was a famous person at the Cha Cha when we headed there after for drinks, but Toddrick, whose birthday it is had already gone home. Sour luck, but all in all, a very good night.

Life is good, and the price is right.

j

fish story

wasabi seared tuna:

soy sauce
sesame oil
fresh jalapeno
a bit of sugar
a modest amount of cilantro
sashimi grade tuna steaks

In a small bowl, pour enough soy sauce to provide a base for a glaze or marinade. This should vary according to the amount of steaks you plan to prepare. Slowly add sesame oil and, using a fork, emulsify as rigorously as possible. If you've never emulsified anything before, simply disrupt (not stir) the mixture as the oil is being added in a very rapid motion of the wrist. You want to break the oil up into as many small droplets as possible. Finely chop fresh jalapeno to taste (err on the side of too spicy: the cooking process and the other flavors in the mixture will compete heavily with the pepper's influence). FInely chop and add cilantro. Stir in sugar. Emulsify again. The sugar is not for taste, it is for consistency and to create the stickiness that a glaze needs. You should neither leave it out nor use enough that you can detect its flavor.

Cover tuna steaks in glaze. Heat a thick-bottomed pan with a small amount of oil in it to medium high. You need a pan that will cook at high heat but will not cook the fish through too fast. If you don't know how to buy fresh fish, look up the fish markets in your area and inquire there about the best days to purchase which types. Normally, people who work at fish markets are more than willing to answer questions.

Place the glazed tuna steaks in the pan, allowing the outsides only to become white and then light brown. This takes only a matter of minutes, and stalling here can make you lose the whole point of the recipe. Remove from heat once the tuna is seared and cut into julienne pieces. Serve atop sushi rice with a shoestring cut cucumber-sesame salad and sparkling water with lime. Enjoy.

jj

pilgrims speak!

"I don't believe in hell, so fuck it. I don't believe in heaven either. I do believe in whiskey, though."

Sometimes when I hear things, that, even though I don't agree with them, i feel like I've chosen the right friends. I have a grumpy pal who doesn't like when I put her name on the internet, but she does like when I borrow or lend her books that I think that she should read. She's going to go to a place where there are wars on two fronts, and I'll be counting on unseen forces she doesn't regard as real to bring her back home.

I was reading a Dr. Bronner's bottle and I was amazed again at how much ridiculous shit there is out there, and just how alluring ridiculous shit is to believe in and to follow. Simple language of principles and 'oneness' are probably going to appeal to people for the rest of time, and if you want to win a lot of friends quickly, learn some short cuts to profundity and employ the cliches as swiftly and broadly as possible. Please, don't concern yourself with depth of knowledge or reflection. Also, accuracy is for the faint of heart.

Now we are looking through old scrapbooks and marvelling at weight fluctuation and dyed hair. Tonight I was given a plant named cassiopoeia. What's in? Eating organs and uplifting jams. Out? Bad vibes.

go with god.

james.

suffixes are a part of life

I began my first effort using a new way of writing and recording yesterday. No hands. It worked as an excercise and as a new way to create songs. Craig called and he is now a master of psychology. It has been that long since we spoke. I also had drinks with Katie Perry and Lynn and Helen at the nexus of Silverlake beverage consumption on Glendale blvd. Katie is going into the writing program in Iowa, Lynn is converting to Judaism, and Helen is nurturing a possum until it is old enough to be rescued. I have been wearing shoes without socks, and growing a beard despite the extremely hot weather. There are no new letters by my name however, all of my credentials are leaps of faith.

j

it hurts to wake up.

Like light through a lens, I feel good right now. Stretched out in long lines and lazy. We went swimming yesterday at Alex's parents' house. I could listen to her father talk for hours, and it'd be entirely for my own benefit. Truly a righteous dude who has read everything, and has most of it in hardcover in his home, poised to lend.

On the way home Audio fell asleep in the back seat and jayson fell asleep in the front. They both were awakened rudely when I had to slam the brakes on the 101. We barely beat a near pile-up and the baby woke up crying. It hurts to wake up sometimes.

Today I watched Italy win the title of best national soccer team in the world, after a healthy dose of human drama, tension, triumph, and disappointment. I saw the game over at RJ Shaughnessy's with he and Steve Berra, and conversation with those two has left my head singing with ideas. Singing like songs, not singing like burned hair. The french team was seriously crushed under the weight of coming so close to real glory, and watching them I thought that there is nothing so inspiring as seeing a grown man cry. Second place is a very bitter position. The highest of the humbled ranks.

Now I'm fully lunched, air-conditioned, and I have lost my tablet containing the last ideas for the tale of the whale. I think i'll have to call RJ before we meet this evening to see 'pirates'. Keep it as nautical as possible, my friends, it is the simplest thing. For in the words of your boy JC (Conrad, not Christ): Each ship is just like another, and the ocean is always the same.

i sort of had to share this.

Sunshine by Jayson Poole and James Jolliff. Recorded in Jayson's apartment in Raleigh, NC in early 2000. Jayson's verse was written that month. James' verse was recycled from an earlier jam made in 1998. Man oh man, does it get deep and dark in here.

a walk in the park

In an economy like this one, we pay for our bad choices with our time. You could spend years cleaning up a week's mess if you can't articulate exactly what it is that you want. And patience, not charm, is the only surefire way to get exactly what you want.

I am in need of a good friend I don't know yet that I can share some stories i've already told before and can tolerate trite wisdoms and nighttime air. Must have own kitchen, or be or have been punk enough to cook and/or eat from mine. It is preferred that this person have interesting tastes in an arena that I know nearly nothing about, and can possibly put me on to things i'm oblivious to. Doesn't necessarily have to dress 'well', but must evidence a degree of awareness and self respect with regards to self-presentation. It doesn't matter if this person is poor. Also, it would be a great benefit if this particular new friend knew how to hear and appreciate a good story, especially one that is not necessarily true.

I spent some time tonight trying to describe to my roommate how being from the south gives you a certain disposition towards religion that isn't easy to explain to others. It's like a figure of speech or a hand gesture that doesn't translate into english. God is just part of the terrain, so even those of us who aren't religious have some of this presence in us, since we've been down there breathing in the same tank with the good god fearing folk for so long. I can't properly articulate it. I think that Mark Cohn was trying to understand this phenomenon when he wrote 'walking in memphis'. This suggestion is not meant as an endorsement of silly gracelandish projections popular rock music has created to portray the south, or to advertise the slick tourist's eye view you get from this song. i'm just saying that this square was trying fairly sincerely to get what we're all about. Good ass try man. You can't expect Mark Cohn to sing you the same story as a VanZant.

Either way, i guess what i drew from this whole bit was that some things, no matter how personally they get spun, really are external. So as much as something is a theoretical idea like 'god' or 'happiness' it lives and breathes as a social reality given the right settings. The simple answers are: If you want to know about God, go to georgia, or somewhere like it. Want to be happy? Lose track of the passing of time. Remember: patience, not charm, is the only surefire way to get what you want.

i'm so bored with the usa.

For two hours it has been the fourth of july. My grip is slipping. I can feel what's important getting away from me. I need something explosive. Hopefully the coming day will provide.

Jayson is going through my old CDs and I am wondering how Craig is doing in Massachusets with his girlfriend who he lives with and his academic career. I imagine that they have a pretty good time. The harbor probably has some amazing fireworks, in the north east being patriotic still seems to have some sort of meaning that can be traced to less conspicuous sources than it can elsewhere. Perhaps they're getting away to another city, or going sailing and wearing light colored clothing and open toed shoes. I sincerely hope that together they share a dog or another pet that requires equal responsibility. I also hope that they are grilling out with couples and beer.

I'll be in echo park watching what cali describes as 'beirut' go down around the lake. What sold me on his recommendation was the vivid descriptions of coke bottle bombs, lovingly made by good old amateur human hands. I hope none of my human hands get blown off in the process.

I thought that there was a walk in my future but it seems like i may be turning in at a more respectable hour this time. As a place where ideas come from, my head is a mite dry at present. So in all of our interests, I should say goodnight here. If anyone knows anything about the LA plants/flower market, you should tell me because i want to know. Remember the Alamo.

jams

gallardo or not

This life is a beautiful one, brushed with just enough sadness to sweeten the rest. I can feel the hurt stinging in the cracks of my skin when it's in, and times like now i'm glad that I am glad to be alive.

Today was the hottest day i've felt since hanoi. Jayson wants to find a pool to go swimming, but I am lazily writing in the big chair by the door with the fan oscillating. I'll probably stay here until the sun has been gone long enough for Erin's house to cool down, and then i'll go there. In my front yard there are two young ladies in audio's plastic pool, and he came home and was glad to have someone to swim with. Ted, Mickey's brother taught him to say 'rad! there's babes in the pool,' and he seems pretty excited about the whole setup.

Today I adopted a plant from home depot. His name is Echelon Khong. Right now he is only a small sapling. But someday soon he'll be a big ass tree.

Today's dedications? Rad dudes and plants. Old friends, babies, babes, swimming pools, and grinding out your gunshyness. Also, the coffee at the place across from trader joes on hyperion.

jams

from fitted caps to written raps

Tonight we played capture the flag. I was on the team that didn't win, which is a shame, because it seems like you work just as hard when you lose.

Dig the friends, the wet grass, and the relatively cool night air. A drawback was that i kept losing my shoes, because I have no foresight and wore jordan twos with no laces in them to run around in circles. I spent most of the night breathing heavily in 'jail' in wet socks. Cooley mixed a secret old jam that we love and made it sound like something new that I haven't ever heard before. I've been working completely around the clock on writings and recordings and that ain't so bad.

It is now four in the morning and our den is occupied by four dudes who are talking about the tallest girl they have ever slept with. I think mine wins, but heaven forbid I trot my business out on the internet of all places. Consider the shame!

I got a message from June today, and I feel that he has more soul than anyone on earth. As trite as the phrase seems, it's true. He has a heart as big as a lincoln and he always keeps a promise. The hardest thing about having people that you love everywhere is that at all times you are, in way or another, very far from home. If I could play you the message he left me I would. He told me that he was calling because he knew that Jayson and I were 'holding it down', and he wanted to thank us for doing so and also to suggest that we continue to. June, consider that heeded.

if you need me, you can find me in bed.

james.